Mardi Gras! Spring Break Forever!

3:15 AM, March 1, Saint Petersburg, Florida …
I was watching an interview, it being the last day I allowed myself to smoke before lent preparations …

I consider Amanda Palmer one of my spiritual mothers; a joan of arc when it comes to honesty.

There is loud, annoying banging coming from the apartment complex building next to my window. I go check it out. I find a young woman there, apparently locked out. I saw her earlier in the day, so I know she was staying with the Cadillac young men. I go outside, and ask her what’s going on.

She was either not interested or capable of intelligeble responses. She’s shaking, and banging louder and louder. I get a little closer. She is only wearing a tight yoga outfit, and is generally disheveled. Drunk, something else? I ask where she’s from – Michigan. No, like are you from around here? Where are you coming from? A few more questions – no keys, no phone, no wallet; she doesn’t even have any footwear.

I ask for a little more information as her banging on the door gets louder and more incessant. I tell her to stop, since it is clear that what she is doing is not working. I get my coat because I am slightly cold, and she clearly was a shivering. When I go to hand it to her, she initially turns and cowers in fear.
[After about 30 minutes, the situation is finally resolved mind you, I don’t have this particular neighbor’s phone no., nor is the landlord answering the phone, and banging on every door and window also did not work. and yes, both cadillac men were in the apartment during this time, but apparently instead of looking out the window or asking what was going on, me and the young woman had a shotgun pointed at us, unbeknownst to me at the time – Yay!]

At 18, I went on spring break with Derek, Tracy, and Tracy. Donna bought me a fifth of stolichnaya and hennessy. The second night in Madiera Beach, away from John and Donna, we settled in to watch the 1997 ncaa mens’ basketball championship between Arizona and Kentucky (Arizona was robbed, I tell you!). Anyways, a fifth of vodka (mixed with pepsi, tip of the ol’ hat to the drink of choice of one Jan Iwaniec) during my first real drinking experience. [needless to say, I spent most of the night with my head in the toilet – I assume I was close to alcohol poisoning? – ]

My first time away from John and Donna, with access to alcohol, and what do I do? I unconsciously/unknowingly attempt to drink myself to death. Ah, the vestiges of growing up – Freedom! Oblivion! Death! ….

I would not wish the next 20 years on my enemies.

It’s the lying that I will not tolerate. It’s the use of words that people have no real definition for.

The most important being love.

Yay!- I do believe my rite of passage into adulthood has been addressed.

You know, I sure am glad things were easy back then … Hello world! [initiate self-destruct sequence]

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